Resource Management Innovations

December 2010 Happenings @ RMI

Season’s Greetings to all of our Friends and Colleagues … throughout North America and around the World;

Google Analytics reports that we have folks who follow us from 34 countries on a regular basis, with the Blog being the landing page of choice. I am thrilled and blessed that you continue to find resources of value on our site and through our Partner relationships. That has always been my intent. I am grateful to know that is the effect. There is always much to report and share from the Foothills of the Rocky Mountains. I am told because of our unique geophysics (yeah, I had to look that one up too) … that this is one of the most difficult places in the world to predict weather.

Life in the Greater Calgary Area is always interesting weather wise, but we have endured what was a very bitter cold period for about 10 days in November that hopefully will now see us back in the seasonal norms until the New Year. We have fresh snow in the mountains almost daily … and here in the Foothills even the horses are sporting winter coats these days.



This is the time of year when many of us will be spending more time at our local retailers, in search of that perfect something for that certain someone. My interest in social sciences and organizational behavior I take with me to the mall … and make a point of gauging ‘the mood’ while there. This is highly unscientific (and I would appreciate feedback on your experience) but I have found that ‘in general’ … many (certainly not all) I come in contact with are, well, angry. Some of that is seasonal, I understand. Scratching past the surface though, the object of today’s blog is more from an emotional health perspective.

I have many colleagues who will rise before dawn, suit up with the running gear to hit the streets before the sun has crested the horizon. Many of those same folks will fuel the physical power plant with a nutritious salad for lunch, and a disciplined portion for dinner. It is hard to find a breakfast, lunch or dinner choice on the grocers shelf it seems without the benefit of a ‘nutritional’ message associated with it. That sounds appropriate, but why has our mental health historically been treated as a cultural faux pas?

Of interest, did you know … that anti depressant pharmaceutical sales in North America is a $13 billion dollar industry? That is more than the GDP of some countries. We stress physical fitness at the earliest possible age, while mental health is spoken of in hushed voices and usually only after something (or someone) has broken. I expect the topic of Emotional Health will keep me busy blogging for some time, as there is just so much ground to cover … and our emotional health as a culture appears not to be ‘self correcting’ … so let’s talk about that amongst ourselves shall we?

One of the healthiest anecdotes I remember hearing that made a great impression upon me is attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt. She is quoted as saying … “No one can insult me without my permission.” Implying that I have complete and total control over how I respond to whatever the stimulus directed at me might be. Wouldn’t that be a topical and relevant message to our teens who experience bullying in their social circles today? Research indicates that 34 percent of Canadian students in Grades 7 to 11 report being bullied within the current school year, and 27 percent of those students have been bullied over the Internet.

Consider one recent study that found while 70 percent of teachers believed they intervene "almost always" in bullying situations, only 25 percent of students agreed with this assessment. These are purely verbal assaults and not physical. Not in any way minimizing the affect of a verbal assault … but clearly with bullying on the rise (at any age and in any venue) clearly our awareness and understanding regarding a response is out of sync with the direct need.


 

In my corporate training days I came upon the work of a man by the name of Viktor Frankl. Viktor was an Austrian born neurologist and psychiatrist and a holocaust survivor. Victor was a highly skilled medical  professional and continued his work and study as a prisoner of war. His life and work is fascinating and I would encourage you to research this remarkable man. It was a study he conducted in the concentration camp as a prisoner / physician that caught my attention.

Viktor’s work focused on two types of principle behavior, Reactive and Proactive. This is so simple and it is so profound … please don’t miss it. It is (I believe) the basis for Eleanor Roosevelt’s perspective.

Reactive Behavior:
Reactive people allow outside influences (moods, feelings or circumstance) to control their responses. In a direct correlation … Stimulus = Response. (Ie. You hit me, I hit you back. There, we are even … which facilitates escalation). Not unlike some foreign policy … but that’s a subject for another blog. Then there is,

Proactive Behavior:
Proactive people use the margins of ‘freedom’ (don’t miss this!) to make choices that best apply to their values. Their conscious, intentional freedom to choose expands as they wisely use the SPACE (of time) between stimulus and response … Stimulus-} … Freedom to choose according to values … {-Response.

In the concentration camp Viktor observed that over time, it was a prisoners ‘response’ to a guards behavior (stimulus) … that ultimately influenced and changed the guards behavior (toward the prisoner).

Two fundamental principles I want to leave with you today:

1) It’s not what people do to us that hurts us. In the most fundamental sense it is our chosen response to what they do to us that hurts us. And,

2) We do not see things as they are. We see things as we are.

How many of the effects of self image could be addressed in whole or in part, if I (intentionally) chose my response to a stimulus based on my values? Taking control (which we seem to value?) … of that segment of time between stimulus and response and acting in concert with my values and principles determines for me, the effect the behavior of others will have on me. Give that some time to process.

Could that simple act change my view of those I find myself in conflict with? The short answer is yes. It can. Will it? Ahhh … that’s where you come in.

Tactical Plan:

1) Be mindful of the stimulus. Then,

2) Take the time to exercise your freedom to choose your response according to your values, and I won’t be rushed … another cultural norm that doesn’t serve, then ...

3) Respond. Recognizing that a non response may be my chosen response … because I didn’t grant you permission.

Eleanor’s analogy put into today’s vernacular could read … “nobody can push my buttons without my permission.”

Give it a try for 30 days. Let me know how it works. Life can be this comfortable …



Cheers;

Rick @ RMI
 

Posted By: Rick Kneeshaw 2010/12/09
Categories: RMI ~ News & Views